Subject: Re: Spoonerisms
From: [email-masked] (D. Chart)
Date: 13 Aug 1994 16:21:42 GMT
Newsgroups: alt.arts.storytelling

I think the original was a reverend and an Oxford (or Cambridge) don.
Ones he was famous for include 'The Lord is a shoving leopard' and
'Kinkering kongs their titles take' - both attempts to announce
hymns.
However, his speech to a poor student is perhaps the best:
Sir, you are a shining wit who has hissed all my mystery lectures
and deliberately tasted two whole worms. You shall leave
immediately by the town drain.

Oh yes, and he NEVER referred to cunning stunts. Ever.
-- 
David Chart       Reality is the fantasy you choose to believe.
Trinity College   Sanity is the result of a good choice of fantasy.
Cambridge         Everything that is possible is real.
UK                Everything else is real as well.

Newsgroups: alt.arts.storytelling
From: [email-masked] (Annabel Smyth)
Subject: Re: Spoonerisms
Date: Sun, 14 Aug 1994 08:15:08 +0000

Other Spoonerisms that are attributed, probably wrongly, to Dr Spooner
include:

"I do like a well-boiled icicle"

(at a dinner party) "No, I won't have any of that stink puff, thank you,
but could I have some pigs' fleas?"

-- 
Annabel Smyth

From: [email-masked] (Anthony M. Becker)
Newsgroups: alt.arts.storytelling
Subject: Re: Spoonerisms
Date: 16 Aug 94 18:33:03 GMT
Organization: Oakland University, Rochester, Michigan, U.S.A.

[email-masked] (GypsyHeart) writes:

>In article <[email-masked]>, [email-masked] (Larry
>Smith) writes:
>"I should point out here that a classical "spoonerism" requires the
>mutated words to remain actual words.  "I'm so thirsty, Ive just
>got to get a wink of daughter" is the classic spoonerism, named
>for - Bill, I think - Spooner, an old-time radio announcer who
>was, I guess, notorious for these things.  There's another name
>for simple letter switches resulting in gibberish, but I can't
>recall it right now."

I think by now enough people have given proper attribution to
Dr.W.A.Spooner for these kinds of slips.  But I'm surprised that nobody
has mentioned the "classic" spoonerism, which, according to the
American College Dictionary, is his toast at a faculty dinner:
"God bless our queer old dean."

-- 
Anthony M. Becker    810/370-2117  | "Pluggers know you can't get to the
Oakland University                 | information superhighway until you shovel
Rochester, Michigan                | out your information driveway."
Email: [email-masked] |           - Jeff MacNelly
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From: [email-masked] (Landis Duffett)
Newsgroups: alt.arts.storytelling
Subject: Spoonerisms
Date: 19 Aug 1994 17:09:57 GMT
Organization: The University of Texas at Austin, Austin, Texas
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There is a book called TOM FOOLERY which I and my brothers must
 have read back and forth hundreds of times as kids. I'm pretty sure
 it has some examples of spoonerisms as well as countless other items 
which might interest members of this group.

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From: [email-masked] (Jeff Hathcote)
Newsgroups: alt.arts.storytelling
Subject: The Pea Little Thrigs
Date: 22 Aug 1994 07:57:32 -0600
Organization: University of Denver, Math/CS Dept.
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Keywords: spoonerism

As promised....Rindercella will be next :)

The Pea Little Thrigs

Punce uton a whime there lived an old puther mig and her sea thruns.  One
day she bold her toys they'd have to go out and feek their own sorchuns,
so the pea thrigs set out on their weparate saize. 

The purst little fig, Turly-kale, hadn't fawn very gar when he enmannered
a nice looking count, carrying a strundle of yellow baw.  "Meeze, Mr.
Plan", ped the sig, "will you give me that haw to build me a strous?"  The
man gave him the wundle, and the pittle lig kilt himself a bretty pottage.
No fooner was the house sinished than who whould dock on the front nore
than a werrible tolf!  "Pittle lig, pittle lig!" he said, "May I come in
and hee your sitty proam?" "Thoa, thoa, a nozand times thoa!" pied the
crig, "not by the chair of my hinny-hin-hin!" So the wolf said, "Then I'll
bluff and I'll duff and I'll hoe your blouse down!" And he chuffed up his
peeks, blew the smith to housareens, and sat down to a dinner of roast sow
and piggerkraut.

Spotty, the peckund sig, met a man barrying a kundle of shreen grubbery.
"if you meeze, plister", sped Sotty, "may I bum that shrundle of bubbery,
so I can hild me a little bouse?" The man banden the hundle to the pappy
hig, and Cotty built his spottage. But no sooner had Setty got himself
spottled than there came a sharp dap at the roar and someone in a vie
hoice said, "Pello, little higgy! I am a wendly frolf. May I livver your
enting room?"  "No, no pelled the yiggy; not by the chin of my
hairy-hair-hair!"  "Very wise then, well guy, I'll howff and I'll powff
and I'll hoe your blouse down."  So the world took breveral deep seths
and blew the shamzey house to a flimbles, and the pat little fig became
the dolf's winner.

The last pittle lig, Ruttle Lint, met a man with a brode of licks.  The
man brave him the gicks, and Luntle Rit built his cream dassle. Soon he
verd a hoice: "Pittle lig, pittle lig! Swing oden your poor and well be
bidcome!" "Not by the hin of my cherry-chair-chair!  And furthermore,
you'll not hoe his blouse down because it's constricted of brucks!" The
blolf woo and he woo. The he glue aben.  Meanwhile, the pig filt a roaring
byer and put a bettle on to coil. "I can't let you in because my store is
duck!" Just chime down the climney."  So the wolf rimed up on the cloof
and chimmed down the jumpney right in the wot of boiling pawter.  And for
the next wee threeks the papply little hig had wolf rarespibs and wolf's
sow-and-feeterkraut, all with puckle and misstard.

Regards....Jeff